Hey guess what I moved! Chris and me are roomies now (again)! My rent is HALF of what it used to be! My cats are freaked out! I mostly don’t have photos, because the place was just too messy to photograph. It literally barely shows up on film. Chris…has a lot of stuff. Okay, we both have a lot of stuff, fine, this is perhaps partly the fault of me and my 96 pairs of unworn knockoff heels and my tiny orange guitar that I don’t know how to play and my 1/8 bottle of salsa that I packed because I was unwilling to throw it away. But…but Chris has a LOT of stuff.

We’re still in the same neighborhood, both of us just a few avenues away from our old places. I think I like my new area a little better, though. It’s a little less Chinese and a little more Mexican, and there seems to be a little bit more going on? Like, the 99-cent stores are better, and…okay, mostly just that. I love a good 99-cent store. My favorite new one over here has a giant, complete Santaria aisle!

There’s also a big old pretty church. When I walked past it tonight, the LED sign was cycling through a bunch of different messages (when the Friday mass was, when the Friday mass was in Spanish, what I assume was when the Friday mass was in Chinese), including one that was advertising, I swear, “twirling lessons.” THAT was what I was standing there waiting to take a photo of, when a really sweet old guy, who I can only assume was the priest or pastor or whatever, came by and started chatting. “Taking pictures of the church?” “Oh…yeah. It’s so pretty with the light like that?” He asked me if I wanted to go inside. I awkwardly declined. “Well, you should go in and see it sometime! It’s even prettier inside!” Actually, I thought I had a photo of it to show you, just at least with a more boring message showing on the sign…but apparently I only PRETENDED for his sake to take photos of it. Hrm.



That big awful skid to the right is from me! It was then kicked safely out of the way and over to the left by the old lady who I almost fell on. As soon as I did, I was about to apologize, of course, but then we both looked down and saw it and both looked back up at each other and both screamed: “It’s a banana peel!!”

AND THEN! I also saw a guy having a conversation on his iphone in sign language, holding it out with one hand for the video feature! And I saw my AWESOME new super, Carlos, riding a bike that was too small for him and we waved and said hi and he’s SO GREAT. And there was a pretty sunset and it was pink.

Basically I have an awesome new place.

SUPER SUPRIZE PRIZE TO CELEBRATE!! Yayyyy! Okay, so Chris and I just set up our wireless router, and we can’t decide what to name the network. (My old one used to be Hellmouth, and then all the computers in the house were named, like, Willow and Spike and Giles and Xander. Chris’s old one was named HateTheInternet, because I guess he was having problems setting it up and was getting more and more frustrated and kept having to rename it or whatever.) So. What should we name the new one! The person who comes up with the best answer wins a SUPER SUPRIZE PRIZE!! It will be, as usual, a surprise, but I can give you a hint of what the category will be. It will be one of Chris’s Things! For he has far too many Things.

Will it be this thing?


Or this thing?


Or one of these things?




Whatever is on these floppy discs? (Six plastic cups from 10-cent beer night, June 4, 1974, thrown in for free!)


A suspiciously labeled but also empty bottle of “crazy salt?”


This pile of wires?


One of these four copies of Infinite Jest? (Chris points out that half of my readers probably already own a copy of Infinite Jest which was provided by Chris, either through theft or gifting. This is certainly how I got MY copy of Infinite Jest. And yes, that’s right, that brings the house total to five copies – literally one for every single room in the house, just so you’re always safe in case you need one in a hurry.)





Who knows! It may be one or all of them, depending on how much I can sneak out of the house without his noticing! Enter today in the comments and find out!!

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  1. Hal’s avatar

    Why don’t you name the router “Jester?”

  2. Jessica’s avatar

    I’m curious about the small metal box labelled “Sub Stumps”? Name the router It’sABananaPeel!!!

  3. Chris’s avatar

    That sub stumps box is YOURS

  4. Chris’s avatar

    Unless of course the Jessica above is not the Jessica who is my roommate now, in which case it is not YOURS, but nor is it MINE. But it could be YOURS.

  5. Jessica’s avatar

    Totally different Jessica! And yes, embarrassingly, that box is MINE. It is full of business cards from, like, sellers at craft shows, I believe. I have no idea why it is labeled “sub stumps.”

    …Fine, I have too many Things, too.

  6. Isley’s avatar

    A few ideas…

    Thy neighbor’s wifi (or any of the “x’s wife” titles)
    Chressica’s Fun-time Interwebz Cantina (that’s right, Chressica!)
    IP Address of the Beast
    Router barely knew ‘er
    Wireless is a treat
    Speak Friend and Enter (I have a good password idea for this one)
    Valinor (for obvious reasons)

  7. Willie’s avatar

    I have no suggestions but am calling the American flag shutter glasses. They will perfectly complement my USMNT game watching outfit; this with one belt buckle like the row seen here

  8. Shena’s avatar

    Its name is Kiiiiid Rock!

    I have never read “Infinite Jest.” Because all of Chris’ copies were loaned out or stolen when I’d try to borrow it.

  9. Jessica formerly known as Gish’s avatar

    Ha. That was me that inquired about sub stumps. I used to have a copy of Infinite Jest that I stole from Willie who I suspect may have stolen it from Chris? However I no longer have it as it was apparently stolen from me.

  10. Jessica’s avatar

    Oh man, these are all excellent. Looks like submissions are winding down? So Chris and I will be choosing a winner sooooooon! Feel free to add more in the next day or so still!