Mermaid Parade! Mermaid Parade! We all dooo what the mermaids saaaaaayyy!!
And mostly, they say, “Look at my boobs!” So we do.
(About half of these photos, incidentally, are by the lovely and talented Miss Meredith. Hers are the ones that are in focus.)
(Yeah. I have a turban. And sometimes I wear it. In public. What?)
The Mermaid Parade is the second-best parade in New York. It bills itself as the world’s largest “art parade,” which I think means: “You can tell everything is made out of pool noodles and glitter, and people are kind of fat.”
I LOVE that people are kind of fat. People are fat and naked and gay and playing silly instruments, and the people in wheelchairs have a definite advantage, costume-wise, and I really love the kids and families. There are SO MANY kids and families, for an event that also features so many boobs and drag queens. It’s the nakedest, dirtiest, druggiest, wholesomest, family-friendliest parade in town.
(The Johnsons there on the left; the Carlsons on the right. They know each other from the Park Slope PTA-sponsored Composting Club. And the guy on the float in the picture below them is little Otis and Asher’s elementary school principal.)
Jill was in the parade! She’s a Sexcamaid! She was in the Post! (Their photo descriptions are hilarious.)
The place where we were standing was near the end of the parade. The marchers were HOT and TIRED and SWEATY and about done with the whole thing. It was frustrating and/or endearing?
Though to be fair, I kind of think this guy was just walking exactly like this throughout the entire length of the parade. I think it was kind of his schtick. He was probably my single favorite marcher. (Here he was texting: “Yeah, no, I’m just in some parade or something, be there in 20.”)
And after the parade, we went to the beach for a bit. Did you know that technically, Coney Island is a topless beach? But that’s only because technically, NYC is a topless city. Did you know that every single person over the age of three on the beach at Coney Island is required by law to have either at least four small or one giant tattoo? I love Coney Island.
(That kid’s tattoo is just on his back; you can’t see it. Like Meredith!)
(That photo originally included her bum. I cropped it. It was a very nice bum! It just seemed a bit forward of me to show it to all of you.)
We rode home with a marching band that I am absolutely sure was from Providence, for basically no reason at all.
We also rode home with this guy:
Wheeeee, etc, that is all.